Restlessness Before Sleep

I don't know how I am going to get through these last two months of school AND finish this experiment for my supervisor. I still have 90 participants to run, and at an hour a piece, I'll probably have to work into the summer which is going to suck! I can't wait to see my paycheck for all this research and time I've spent at school, because considering all the places I want to travel before Grad school, I'm going to need a lot of money...

Even more frustrating is the fact that I have not been able to read for pleasure since this semester started. It feels like reading week just began and yet I am 8 chapters and 3 articles behind in my work!! So even when I do have time to read, it HAS to be school related, and not any one of the 26 books collecting dust in my closet, waiting for me to open their beautiful, lovingly bound pages. Oh well.

And I am happy to say I had my first few comment on one of my entries! A wonderfully exuberant person amazingly expressing their rightful opinions and thoughts, something I always love to see. The thrill of the argument, and the unfolding of opinions, stories, ect..for individuals to understand one another with an open mind and a soft heart. And it struck me that I haven't made good on my promise to regale this lonely blog with my findings after reading the Koran. As I anticipated, I found things both good and bad within its pages. Generally, the bad I found to be really disconcerting, and the good I found to be contradicted by the bad. Now I am purposely NOT being specific here because I did not want to rant and lose my objectivity, or make anyone upset, angry or uncomfortable. This is the very LAST thing that I want to do. So instead, I invite all the randoms who happen to stumble upon this blog to take out a copy of the Koran and read it. Just read it. Both Muslims and Non-Muslims, but especially Muslims. Do not assume that you know it because you studied in school, read it yourself. From beginning to end, and make up your own mind. I think there is nothing more beautiful than educating oneself and completely immersing yourself in books, so please do.

In more worldly news, Gadhafi seems to have lost complete control over most cities of Libya. Now he holds tightly and pathetically onto power in Tripoli. People are hypothesizing he will be history in weeks, if not days so yay!! For the time being however, my heart goes out to the people of Libya, wholly and completely. Today I heard one mothers grim tale of the happenings in Tripoli and the fear and sadness in her voice was almost deafening. It was hard to listen to. What really struck a cord with me is how strong she was. She mentioned that most often she felt as if she were going insane, but she made sure to knock herself out of it, and tell herself, "Be strong. This is your freedom you're fighting for, and it's not going to come easily." We saw this in Egypt as well: People willing to die for their freedom. Beautiful. I hope, I hope, I hope only the best for countries in the Middle East. They NEED freedom from oppression, they need democracy, they need a secular and HONEST government, and above all they NEED education. This is the most precious gift that can be given to these people. Education. Indeed, I hope all these needs are fulfilled, and that in the end, peace and love are victorious over hate, radicalism, dictatorship, and corruption.

I hope.

Time for bed.

Todays Tea: Honey Lemon.

Peace, Love, and Understanding. 

The Boiling Point

Again with the redundant blaming of the U.S.

Oh there are protests because they are controlled by western power, the people are getting paid, and in Gadhafi's own comical words, "the rats (referring to the anti-government protesters) are being fed hallucinogenic pills by Americans and thats why they are protesting."

Really? I mean....really?

I sincerely hope for the sake of humanity and to a lesser extent my sanity, no one is actually falling for this classic last resort of the dictators of the middle east. This same message was spewed out by Mubarak before he stepped down, along with the the ritualized tactic if saying well "its either me and poverty/economic hardships or Muslim extremists and oppression/terrorism. Like there is NO WAY there could be a third option. Meanwhile, the significant majority of protesters have again and again trued to maintain that THIS IS NOT ABOUT RELIGION! Now, rightly so, some people dont buy this, and maybe we should be slightly fearful. But the not buying it attitude is NOT because the people are lying, its because the Muslim extremists (i.e. the Muslim Brotherhood) are the most, even ONLY, well organized group functioning! Which is why I think that there needs to be universal action done to ENSURE that the people of Libya, Egypt, Iran, ect... are not just given yet ANOTHER dictator or an oppressive regime that is forced down their throats! They need help by outside sources that are willing to implement a temporary government (that is RELIGIOUSLY NEUTRAL!) just in order to make sure that the transition to a democratic society with free and fair elections made by the people happens fast and happens MEANINGFULLY! Even if it is considered metaling in other countries' business, it NEEDS to be done. Because if a power vacuum is left, it will either be replaced by another dictator yet again (which I am sad to say is the direction Egypt now looks to be going), or a psycho crazy fundamentalist Muslim group looking to cause problems in Israel and the US.

On to more current news: Gadhafi is a nut job. Wave upon wave or interviewers have mentioned that he seemed to be high or intoxicated during interviews, he sees himself as a God, and he has already said he is willing to kill every last Libyan who is against him before he even considers leaving. And yet there has STILL been no direct statement from the Whitehouse for him to fuck off. I know Obama is probably in over his head, and people need to relax and sympathize that this is a fucking difficult time for him, but seriously his next speech needs to mention that the Gadhafi regime has proven that it is ILLEGITIMATE and that all members of the regime that continue to act upon Gadhafi's orders will be held completely responsible for their actions. Oh and by the way fucking idiots, the world is watching. You just managed to piss people off a hell of alot more Gadhafi thanks to your egocentric power hungry douchbag-ness, so much so that Libyans are actually willing to be found and killed JUST to be able to get the word out to CNN and other news stations. So how about you stop finding other damn countries to blame for your fucked up regime, and start listening to your people. Dumbass.

Even more sick and twisted is the constant "Oh whats going to happen to all that oil? Who's going to get control of the oil?" Question after question about the damn oil on news stations and people worried about oil prices when millions upon millions of people are crying for freedom! Millions and millions of people who have up to 60 YEARS of catching up to the rest of the world to do. As fucked up the Bush administration was in trying to implement their plan for freedom in the middle east, Bush had one thing right on: Our deadly addiction to oil. An addiction that we value over the lives of people. It is fucking sick that there is more concern about oil prices going up a dollar or two than the millions of people afraid to leave their own homes!! Imagine! These aren't thugs you're scared of waiting for you outside your place, this is your government....YOUR government that is out to kill you! Just because they can.

I feel completely useless and pathetic.

Todays Tea: Organic Green.

Peace, Freedom, and Democracy in the Middle East: Please.

Pieces are Falling (Hopefully into place)

The domino effect is playing out as predicted. As I hope the world knows, Libya's unrest quickly unfolds, albeit more violent than Egypt. And we can attribute that violence to the mentally imbalanced, womanizing piece of work that is Gadhafi. Considering the bold and utterly stupid actions he has made and statements he made, I would either peg him as an incomprehensibly confident man with balls of steal,....or severely psychologically abnormal and a man who is completely out of touch with reality.

Luckily amidst his corrupt regime, there are some surfacing heroes peaking their lovely heads from the darkness. Namely, the fighter pilots who were ordered to drop bombs on the Libyan protesters but refused to carry out the heinous demand and fled to Malta to seek refuge, and of course the Interior minister who resigned because he did not wish to follow Gadhafi's orders. Hopefully over the next few days, more and more men working for the crazy tyrant see the light and tell him to fuck off. In simple terms, all the predictions are pointing towards his removal, but he is an incredibly stubborn man who has said he will kill ALL the people before he even considers leaving. Yea...

SO my fear is this will soon become a matter of global concern. The UN will have to step in, actually I think they have already called for his resignation which really had no impact. So soon there will be pressure on the US to step in and send troops into Libya to keep the peace. It should not just be the US, this should be a global comprehensive move to push him out in a way that will cause the LEAST amount of damage possible. If it is left only to the US, it will only cause more backlash from neighboring Middle Eastern countries, and no one wants that.

Something HAS to be in place to ENSURE (once Gadhafi is out) that the elections are MEANINGFUL! Especially since this is Libya we are talking about and it is the largest occupier of oil in the middle east. The worst, most frightening case scenario that could happen is if Radical Islamist groups like al qaeda or hamas sneak in and adopt power. These severely backward people could potentially hold the rights to all of this oil, and Gadhafi leaving may create a power vacuum making particularly fertile ground for those groups to swoop in. Everything needs to be done in order to ensure transition of power is decided by the people. I'm getting hives thinking about it! I know its a hell of a lot more difficult than I am making it sound, but for some reason I take comfort in posting my thoughts and opinions on this blog naively hoping somehow, someway I am getting the word out.

Anyway, I need to sleep.

More soon.

Todays Tea: Sencha Green with Mint (yea I know its repetitive, but it relaxes me !!)

Hope for LOVE&PEACE in the Middle East.

Mandy

We were never built to last.

You’re on your own now. We’re tired of lending hands. 

Our new agenda: it cuts you from all our plans. 

So get in line, boy. And keep that mouth of yours closed. 

Don’t need opinions. Just work them hands to bones. 

We stood in place and watched them tear us apart. 

They cut us open and ripped out all our parts. 

But we kept quiet. We let them have their way. 

We made our point by having nothing to say. 

We all broke up right on cue. 

We’ll take you down with us too. 

You’d better jump ship. This bastard is sinking fast. 

There’s nothing to save here. Our worth has all but passed. 

The muddy waters are slipping in through the cracks. 

The ship is sinking. 

We sit on our hands and watch it all fall. 

No one blinks an eye. 

There’s not much worth saving. 

Just lots of buildings and concrete colored skies. 

But then you came and picked us up. 

You combed our hair, and made us look like people. 

And we learned to feed ourselves again. 

We built some homes and filled them full of clones. 

But we won’t wait until you get back. We’ll be gone long before you arrive. 

We were never built to last. But we’d like to tell you: 

Thanks for the good time. It was nice to have known you. 

We’ll all be just fine, and we’ll try to write you. 

We appreciate the lies, but we’re done believing you.

Todays Tea: Sencha Green with Mint.

Until later...

GAD

I really need to work on my anxiety, or it'll kill me very soon. I don't even know why I'm anxious all the time!! Bah.

I have no time to post an actual blog, but I do have big plans. Big plans. Or they may just seem that way because my life is pretty tame by comparison.

That is all. Peace.

Todays Tea: Sencha Green with Mint

Mandy

Fear is Defeated (Hopefully for good)

Hey Mubarak, don't let the door hit your poor ungrateful ass on the way out! 

Yes, Yes, Egypt is free from that good for nothing, corrupt tyrant. Sorry for the intense delay. This blog should have been posted around 12PM on Friday when he actually did resign. Of course (as my luck would have it), I've been watching nothing but the news for the passed 3 weeks, eating, talking, and breathing the hope of a democratic Egypt, and OF COURSE he decides to step down during the 2 hours that I'm in class, and away from my television!! So I had to hear about this amazing changing of history and (possibly) the world over a freaking text message from a friend! Nonetheless, I was jumping up and down when I found out.

Of course this elation lasted for a few hours and then I started to become fearful and nervous. I mean the revolution is only in its infancy. Despite the overwhelming opinion that this is not like 1979 Iran, and despite the statistic that shows the Muslim Brotherhood only has about 25% of the votes if they do choose to run in the (hopefully) truly democratic elections in Egypt, there is still always that nervousness and worry that people should feel and be cautious of.

The protesters do seem to trust their Military council though, and they say that they will keep protesting until they incorporate some of the key civilians into discussions for re-writing the constitution, and having talks with opposition leaders. And hope does seep back in knowing that the two Military officials are pretty secular in their beliefs. Nonetheless, the people of Egypt should be vigilant, and should work tirelessly to force cooperation with Military council and to move this (previously thought improbable) revolution into a Democratic Egypt. I hope hope hope this is the beginning of the end of Islam theocracy in the Middle East and the beginning of something beautiful where people of all backgrounds, beliefs, religions, sects, ect..can live together without the fear of prosecution by others trying to impose their own beliefs and faiths on them. I may sound like a complete hippy but I don't care! I feel hippy-ish.

I should get back to studying.

Todays Tea: Orange Pekoe

Mandy

Billionaire Criminals

Jeez, I consider myself a strong person, but these beautiful people in Egypt, these Christians and Muslims coming together throwing a big FUCK YOU to Mubarak and his henchmen, and vowing to die if they have to to make sure their demands are met. I am posting a lot about this, yes, and I apologize to the ghosts or whoever are reading this and getting sick of it but too damn bad! I will keep bringing this up until Egypt has hopefully made the transition to a democratic and peaceful country with no religious favoritism. I keep writing about it in part because I know that their story needs to remain fresh in people's minds for as long as it takes for the tyrant and his douchbag regime to get lost, and also because I feel powerless. I am trying to talk about it as much as I can, and get people talking, and posting on facebook, and youtube, ect..but I feel helpless. I want to fly over there and get in Tahrir square with them and just help someway. It sucks. It sucks that the Egyptian government is feeding the world these (in some cases absolutely comical) lies! Thank god though more and more of them seem to be getting caught in their own lies everyday and the truth is unravelling and making the regime look THAT much more corrupt. More so than anyone has ever seen before. I'd like to give a salut to Anderson Cooper actually for all his work on the story, keeping it alive, and telling the truth straight up and not beating around the bush like every other newscaster I've seen. Truth be told, since this protest for freedom and democracy started, I haven't been able to watch anything BUT the news. I don't know why I am affected and so moved by this story. I just love to see people looking beyond menial differences into the heart of the problem, and coming together as a stronger people. Its beyond admirable, and I only wish I had 1/10th the amount of strength and courage as any one of those protesters in Tahrir square.

Anyway I should go to bed.

More Love.

Todays Tea: Jade snow with thyme leaves.

Mandy